One of my mentors, Sandra Yancey, CEO of eWomenNetwork has a saying that if something pops up to you 3 times or more you better listen…the universe is telling you something.

Last year during one of the toughest part of my health issues, I was exhausted by dinner every night and struggled not be go to sleep at 7PM. In order to stay awake for as long as possible, I watched movies on Netflix every night. 3 of the movies I watched had a theme of ‘perspective’ in them. 2 of them, directly talked about perspective and actually gave great examples.

The first one was “Soul Surfer”. It is the story of Bethany Hamilton, who was competitive surfer from Hawaii, set to start a career as a professional surfer. (who knew there was such a thing). Before her career could even get started she was attacked by a shark while surfing and lost an arm.

In the movie, Carrie Underwood plays her church youth leader, and in a scene that happens at a youth group meeting Carrie showed 2 photos and asked the group what they though the phots were. The kids tossed out all sorts of answers but none of them were correct. The photos were actually extremely close up shots of a walnut, and the eye of a fly. She went on to say that if you are really struggling or things don’t make sense, sometimes it helps to get a new perspective.

Watch that scene here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lc0f9IS3whY

The second movie was Love Happens. In this move the main character is Burke Ryan played by Aaron Eckhart He is a successful therapist and author of a self-help book that gives advice about dealing with grief from the loss of a loved one. He is in Seattle hosting a live conference and in one of the small group sessions he leads the guests out into the middle of a down town street. He asks them to point out what they see and hear. Honking horns, stoplights, construction, angry people, lots of cement were some of the answers.

He then walked the guests up the stairs of the hotel until they reached the roof, and again asked them what they saw and heard. Birds, trees, Mt Rainier, beautiful rivers and tall buildings were some of the answers this time.

Burke went on to point out that being up there was different, but it was the same. They hadn’t gone anywhere new they just seeing it from a different perspective. He goes on to say what I think is the best line of the movie “Inside each of you there are sirens, honking horns and gridlock, but there is also this. We just have to do the work and climb the stairs to find it”.

I had these 2 examples of perspective on my mind during the whole drive home and I wondered what steps could we make that would be considered “doing the work” of changing your perspective and I came up with a list. Here are my top 5.

1. Eliminate the word “should”. This has been a BIG one for me lately. I have been battling the lingering effects from having Covid earlier in the year. They call it ‘Long Covid’ and it has been destructive both physically and emotionally. If I had a nickel for every time I thought “I should be feeling better” I could pay for all the testing I have had done over the last 3 months. There is no “I should” only “I am”. Don’t let others expectations affect your outlook.

2. Look at the bigger picture…..I am lucky. I survived Covid. Many did not.

3. Look at the smaller picture…I have learned a lot about how my body works, and I have had to learn to listen intently to it. I have had to slow down, take a lot of breaks and spend a lot of time focusing on my breathing and my heart rate. When I overdo it, I have to spend a day, maybe 2 to recover. Right now that is my reality. I must accept that and appreciate what I can do. So often we miss the little things in our lives. Little things can have big impact so stop and notice them sometimes.

4. Help others. When we help others we go outside ourselves and see that we all have our burdens to bear. They are different but the same. The loads that we share are easier for us all.

And

5. Journal your thoughts. Writing down what is bothering you, whether a situation, an emotion, what you are fearing or experiencing puts boundaries on it. It no longer grows exponentially in your mind. You can see it for what it is and you can leave it on the page. You can crumple it up and throw it away. You can burn it. Or you can save it for the future so you can see how far you have come.

Remember YOU are in control of how you view your life. Changing your perspective might make the hard things a little easier.